Dilemma

Purturbed perplexity and chagrin at my current norm
i seem, against my plan, stranded afar and alone from

all tediously designed, calculated, determined passage
disconcertingly alone with no counsel, no friend, no sage

do I in surge to d'unknown forward, seek as life does tell
or in learnings of a harried but certain past do I dwell

(written in 2012)